Thursday, October 3, 2013

Heartbeat


The air smells like spring seduced late summer and drenched the night in promises.  Somewhere between possibility and substance, the evening hovers.  A strange shade of autumn.

But the clouds seem darker.

I nudged his knees apart as he sprawled on the creased coffee brown leather couch, remote in hand. The speckling of pin pricks over his shoulder a silent reminder of the Christmas kitten that filled my heart with joy and, years later, with grief as I buried him.

"What's up?" he murmured as I sank down, my hip fitting into the space between his. My shoulders dropped slowly towards his chest.  I swear the night paused as my abdomen curled...my head dipped...

And his heartbeat became the universe.

The thud that embodies tomorrow, no matter the anxiety of today.  The literal fading of 'to do' lists and apprehensions and doubt.

Thump, thump, thump...

Breathe.

Footsteps on the stairs, my fourteen year old son coming down for a snack before bed.  I lay there, the muscular drum echoing in my ear; my hair, uncut since January, tangled about us.  Footsteps retreating.  Recognition of a moment that, while he may not understand, my eldest knew I needed. 

Amazing...astounding what fifteen minutes surrounded by the throb of another's heart can do for the equilibrium of a soul.

Storms arrive and abate.

The planet spins.

And hearts beat.

16 comments:

Mandy_Fish said...

I love this. It's like I was there. (I have been there.)

Mandy_Fish said...

I love this. It's like I was there. (I have been there.)

Mandy_Fish said...

Once. Twice. Thrice.

Out on the prairie said...

(heavy sigh)
a nice heartfelt thought, very well written

NicePeace said...

gorgeous,i want,

momo

terlee said...

An enveloping hug, and the steady rhythm of a beloved heart can warm the soul. A lovely post...

Robbie Grey said...

Very beautiful...

Chantel said...

My friends--I cannot put into words how greatful I am that you still wander by and leave a note now and again; my writing has been sporadic at best lately. In fact, I think "sporadic" might be the perfect adjective for the last few months...

Wishing you all the peace of a moment, the reassurance of a heart beating next to yours, and an autumm filled with the colors of dreams.

xo

Shea Goff said...

Sporadic or not., it's always a treasure.

BLissed-Out Grandma said...

You are a wonderful writer...who else would write about the air smelling like spring seduced summer, etc.? And I'm glad to write about happy and peaceful moments in your life. May there be lots of them.

Mom of the Perpetually Grounded said...

The comfort of secure love. Nothing like it.

Mel Heth said...

This made me ache. Savor every minute with that man and that heart.

ND Mitchell said...

Another moment brought beautifully to life :)

The Loerzels said...

I get so lost in your writing, like I'm right there with you. Or just peeking in through a darkened window from outside, a voyeur.

ravenjanedoh said...

I've been wondering what it is I'm so in need of; why am I feeling so hollow and empty? I think I get it. The loneliness is deafening, and I'm missing another's heart. I need to hear that symphony of life; heartbeat, breath, voices.
Thank you for sharing ... you've been on my mind - you would love the scenery here these days. ;)

Brian Miller said...

surrounded by the throb of another persons heart...that is def a peaceful and wonderful place to be....